Holiday TV Viewing Guide (Dec. 15-21)

— SATURDAY, DEC. 15 —

10:00 AM
Top Chef Holiday Special
Bravo
Fan favorites from seasons one through three prepare holiday meals to be judged for a $20,000 top prize.

11:00 PM
MAD TV: “Holiday Show ’06”
FOX
Jeff Probst mocks himself for your viewing pleasure.

— SUNDAY, DEC. 16 —

8:00 PM
The Simpsons: “Eternal Moonshine of the Simpson Mind”
FOX
Homer wakes up in the snow after drinking Moe’s “Forget-Me-Shot.” With both his memories and his family gone, he worries that he may have done something awful to drive them away, and enlists the help of Professor Frink to piece together the events from the night before.

9:00 PM
Extras: “The Christmas Special”
HBO
In this surprisingly emotional series finale, Andy quits his silly sitcom in the hope of finding more meaningful projects. Instead, he finds himself fading further into obscurity as he’s forced to humiliate himself on Doctor Who and Celebrity Big Brother. Celebrity cameos include George Michael, Gordon Ramsay, Clive Owen and TV Bacon fave David Tennant!

Watch a preview of the episode below:

9:30 PM
American Dad: “Most Adequate Christmas Ever”
FOX
Stan demands a grander Christmas and sets out to find a bigger tree in the forest, where he meets an untimely end.

— MONDAY, DEC. 17 —

7:00 PM
Alice: “Mel’s Christmas Carol”
ION
It’s just not Christmas without a cheesy sit-com A Christmas Carol spoof.

9:00 PM
Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends: “A Lost Claus”
Cartoon Network
Mac and Bloo must regain their faith in Santa Claus to prevent a horrible holiday.

— TUESDAY, DEC. 18 —

6:00 PM
Friends: “The One With Phoebe’s Dad”
TBS
“Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. Ugly Naked Guy is decorating his tree. Oh my God, you should see the size of his Christmas Balls.”

10:00 PM
Boston Legal: “Green Christmas”
ABC
Carl and Katie defend the firm against a client who claims Denny misled them about the environmental friendliness of the firm’s offices; Alan takes on a bank that threatens to foreclose on Clarence’s home.

10:00 PM
Nip/Tuck: “Duke Collins”
FX
Sean discovers the secret between Christian and Julia. Not sure what that has to do with Christmas, but I’ve heard there will be porn elves and scantily clad Santa’s helpers. Ho ho ho.

— WEDNESDAY, DEC. 19 —

9:00 PM
Gossip Girl: “Roman Holiday”
CW
Blair’s father brings an unexpected guest when he comes home for the holidays; Jenny and Vanessa help Serena plan a Christmas surprise for Dan.

9:00 PM
South Park
Cartoon Network
Enjoy a mini-marathon of the show’s Christmas episodes, including “Red Sleigh Down,” “Mr. Hankey’s Christmas Classics,” “Christmas in Canada,” and “Woodland Critter Christmas.”

— THURSDAY, DEC. 20 —

2:30 AM
The Venture Brothers: “A Very Venture Brothers Christmas”
TOON
Evil genius Chris McCulloch irreverently skewers beloved holiday television traditions in this so-wrong-it’s-right Christmas episode.

4:00 PM
MythBusters: “Christmas Special”
Discovery Channel
Jamie and Adam take on favorite holiday myths.

9:00 PM
Iron Chef America: “All Star Holiday Dessert Battle”
Food Network
Paula Deen and Cat Cora compete against Tyler Florence and Robert Irvine. Allez! Cuisine! 

— FRIDAY, DEC. 21 —

5:00 AM
The Tick: “The Tick Loves Santa”
Toon Disney
“Here’s a clue…if he jumps up and kicks you in the stomach, it’s probably not Santa.” Multiple Santa terrorizes The City, but The Tick is powerless to fight back against his beloved Christmas icon.

5:00 PM
Gilmore Girls: “Forgiveness and Stuff”
ABC Family
Travel back to season one, when Luke gives a car-less Lorelai a ride to the hospital after her father collapses at the family Christmas party.

12 Days of Bacon: Day Two

On the second day of Christmas, my Bacon gave to meeeeee…

12 Days of Bacon: Day One

On the first day of Christmas, my Bacon gave to meeeeee…

2007 Golden Globes Television Nominees

The Hollywood Foreign Press Association announced its nominations for the 65th annual Golden Globes this morning and the biggest surprise among the television nominees was the head-scratching exclusion of The Office from the comedy series category.

The awards will be presented Jan. 13 and televised on NBC, although the ongoing writers strike could impact the telecast. If the WGA refuses to grant a waiver allowing guild writers to work on the ceremony’s script, it’s unknown how many presenters and nominees would be willing to cross the picket line in order to attend.

Look behind the cut for the complete list of television nominees…

2007 WGA Television Nominees

The best writing on television seems to be happening on cable, at least according to the Writers Guild of America, which on Wednesday announced nominations for outstanding achievement in television, radio, news, and promotional writing during the 2007 season.

HBO led the networks this year, earning multiple nominations for The Sopranos, The Wire, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Entourage, Extras and Flight of the Conchords. Among the broadcast networks, NBC’s The Office scored a whopping three nominations in the episodic comedy category, as well as a nod for comedy series.

The complete list of television nominees is behind the cut…

On the Last Day of Hanukkah, My [Pork Product Deleted] Gave to Meeee…

The calendar has conspired against us in celebrating both Hanukkah and Christmas in our 12 Days countdown, but we didn’t want to leave out our friends who are lighting the eighth candle tonight. The following is a Robert Smigel offering from Saturday Night Live, with the great Darlene Love highlighting how the Christmas season can provide some good times for the chosen people, too. Please feel free to play for the Lakers, preferably bumping Kobe Bryant right off the bench, and let’s hope next December brings all of us visions of The Daily Show dancing in our heads again.

On the First Day of Bacon, My TV Gave to Me…

We like the holiday season. We like it a lot. I just went to a 7am choir rehearsal. Susannah just made cookies with 2.5 pounds of chocolate in them (I’m not exaggerating either of those facts for effect). You may have noticed our TV Bacon header changing in celebration (all Susannah’s brilliance). That’s how much we like the holidays. To celebrate, TV Bacon is wishing everyone the happiest of Winter-Holidays-of-Your-Choice with teeny little nifty gifties for the 12 Days of Christmas. Yes, we know that in ye olde traditions, the 12 Days of Christmas fell between Christmas Day and the Epiphany, but we like ’em better here, in their modern usage. We’re also starting a day early so we can end on Christmas Eve, because, well, we know you’re not going to be reading on Christmas Day. So we’re playing a little fast and loose with the dates (it’s wibbly-wobbly, timey-wimey stuff), but we’re absolutely sticking to the 12 days, if that’s any consolation.

So check back here each day for your teeny nifty gifty–it’s not exactly a winter wonderland, but we hope there’s some goofy fun or warm TV memories for all. Happy holidays!

We Need a Little Opera, Right This Very Minute

Now that pledge drive season is over and you can watch PBS without the threat of Big Bird or Betty White cutting you if you don’t pick up the phone (I can say it–I’m on the monthly plan), check out the fairly amazing list of stuff coming up on public television. They’re not just updating Masterpiece Theater–they’re your one-stop upper-crust holiday entertainment shop. If PBS is assuming I’m going to be sitting on the floor, weeping and trying to untangle Christmas lights or 300 yards of wrapping paper and therefore in need of some holiday cheer in the form of high art, they’d be right. As is always true with public television, you’ll want to check your local listings, but a quick nationwide spot check suggests the following are all premiering on the same date, whether you’re in Iowa or Idaho.

Wednesday, December 12—Wrestling with Angels: Playwright Tony Kushner is a fine documentary on the author of Angels in America. While it hits all the highlights–the controversy over both Angels and Homebody/Kabul; the difficulties of growing up gay in a Southern, Jewish family–it was the footage of Brundibar that made me cry when I saw this film at Sundance. Don’t know the story of Brundibar? I didn’t either. The entire broadcast will be worth it just for that.

Monday, December 17—The Rise and Fall of the City of Mahagonny will cut right through any holiday treacle you might be choking on with its Brechtian satire. If you only know Audra McDonald from the mess that is Private Practice, see her in her musical-theater element–and prepare to be wowed.

Wednesday, December 19—Christmas with the Mormon Tabernacle Choir featuring Sissel broadcasts the Choir’s annual Christmas program. Dancers! Bells! The Titanic singer who isn’t Celine Dion! Plus, the choir is utterly stunning–if you haven’t heard them do “Angels from the Realm of Glory,” with which they close the concert every year, then you haven’t heard Shakespeare the way it was meant to be played. It is possible I am slightly biased, as the soloist on “The Wexford Carol” is my neighbor, but once you hear him sing and remember that he named his beagles Eowyn and Arwen, you’ll join me in my bias.

PBS Updates MASTERPIECE THEATRE

After 37 years, PBS is updating its revered anthology series, Masterpiece Theatre. Starting next year the show will be split into three mini-seasons, each with its own name and host.

Masterpiece Classic will premiere on Jan. 13 with new host Gillian Anderson, already familiar to PBS fans for her turn as Lady Dedlock in Bleak House. The new series will showcase 10 programs through May, including adaptations of all six of Jane Austen’s novels; Cranford, a three-part miniseries starring Judi Dench; My Boy Jack, starring Daniel Radcliffe as the son of Rudyard Kipling; and a new adaptation of E.M. Forster’s A Room with a View by Andrew Davies (the scribe behind several of the new Austen adaptations, as well as the highly esteemed 1996 Pride and Prejudice).

Masterpiece Mystery! will debut in the summer, absorbing the Mystery! anthology series that has been a PBS fixture since 1980. In the fall, Masterpiece Contemporary will focus on dramas set in the present day. Hosts for the other two Masterpiece mini-seasons have yet to be announced.

JOURNEYMAN Times Out

NBC has let the option lapse on time-travel drama Journeyman, a move that essentially signals cancellation of the low-rated show. The network had until Tuesday to give a full-season pickup to the series, which performed particularly poorly this Monday without its usual Heroes lead-in.

Last week NBC gave fellow rookie Life a test run in Journeyman‘s Monday 10 p.m. slot after the much-hyped Heroes finale. Life didn’t show much improvement over Journeyman‘s numbers in the time slot, but the cop drama has been steadily gaining momentum in the coveted 18-49 demo on Wednesday nights and has already been given a full-season order by the network.