Despite the fact that Alex O’Loughlin has about as much range and charisma as a piece of cardboard with a frown painted on it, CBS seems stubbornly determined to build a show around the guy. Hawaii Five-0, a remake of the classic cop show from the 1960s, is the eye network’s second strike, after the ill-fated Moonlight (which missed the current vampire renaissance by *this much*).
Unfortunately for the new Hawaii-Five-0, the rest of the cast isn’t much more interesting than O’Loughlin. Lost‘s Daniel Dae Kim is about dynamic here as he was on Angel, which is to say, not dynamic at all. One begins to suspect the man’s at his best when he’s not allowed to talk much. But I really have hate in my heart for the writers who decided that Battlestar Galactica‘s Grace Park, the ONLY female lead, needed to be mostly naked in two of her THREE whole scenes in the pilot episode. Not that Grace Park is Meryl Streep or anything, but she can certainly do more than show off her abs. Scott Caan is the cast’s one high point. He’s actually rather adorable, but he has no hope of overcoming the sucking personality vacuum generated by the rest of his co-stars. The poor guy might as well be acting opposite a cinderblock wall.
To honest, though, Hawaii 5-0 is fine for what it is. The dialogue is wall-to-wall cliches and the characters are straight out of the television writer’s archetype playbook, but the plots are serviceable, if predictable, and the locale is almost as pretty as the actors. There are also several nice nods to the original, in the revival of the show’s iconic theme music and in the use of the old catchphrase, “Book ’em Danno.” And really, in a landscape littered with the likes of Criminal Minds and NCIS, Hawaii Five-0 isn’t so bad.